pretending to pretend
Why do we like to pretend like everything's okay?
Why isn't it okay to not be okay?
Have y'all ever noticed that the automatic reply to a "how's it going?" is typically "fine and you?"
If someone has ever responded with a negative answer such as "not so good..." we almost feel caught off guard
What do you even say to that?
Do we even care if the reply is something other than "fine"?.
It's as if the universal reply is "doing good" regardless of how we're really feeling.
BUT, why is that even normal?
My guess is that we live in a bubble world where everyone is too busy to listen and care for one another. Sometimes we fail to understand our own emotions... and that is where everything starts to go downhill.
Lately I've been feeling a little bit of everything. If it's an emotion chances are within the last two months, I've felt it.
I am not entirely sure how good that is but I'm here for it and maybe I'm not alone. It's hard to explain and the best way I can describe these mushed feelings is with one word... unfocused.
I am probably one of the most undercover emotional individuals you'll ever meet. Sure I'll sit here all day and write to you about my emotions/feelings but 4/10 if we were in the same room you'd probably get the generic response of "I'm fine."
Why? well, because for the most part I am fine.
But I too have been failing at understanding my own emotions. I've been pushing them to the ground for quite some months because I myself didn't understand them, still don't.
One thing I've come to understand is that life is all about finding a balance. I am not sure where my balance is, which has been my current struggle. Once I figure that out I'm sure I'll still be an emotional wreck but I'll be an emotionally balanced wreck, haha.
How do we find our balance? Anyone out there know the secret?
Truth is, no, there's no secret. Everyone is different.
What works for you may not work for me. Our lives are as unbalanced as we want them to be... because believe it or not we are in control.
If you're anything like me you love to run around giving advice but never take the time and apply that same advice to your own life.
One thing I know for sure is that I am no longer living by pretending to pretend.... or as we are calling it these days #livingmybestlife
I say this only because I have only used that quote during the times where I was NOT living my best life but I was trying to put up a front as if I was. Now I'll simply say that I will be living an emotionally unbalanced life until I work my way to finding a balance.
As for the emotions... they'll always be there. But I am learning how to properly handle them.
The FIRST STEP to that is
talking about them.
letting go of them.
pretending they don't exist.
because well, THEY DO!
Let's try something new, next time a stranger or a friend asks you "how are you doing?"
share your actual feelings whether it's a positive or negative response and watch their reaction.
Maybe if it's a stranger it'll open up conversation for some great advice, or they'll simply ignore your response and move on with their lives (most likely to happen) ... but at least you've said how you're actually feeling out loud and it'll feel freeing.
Or if it's a friend you're sharing this with maybe it will open up a topic of discussion that both of you have been avoiding.
"I think one of the most beautiful things about being human is that we can feel... "
PS. I hope I didn't loose you with all my rambling. As always THANKYOU for reading. I hope that wherever it is you are in life ... you feel better than "just fine".
Have you ever had a childhood memory that was so dear to your heart and it involved a specific place. Every time you think of this place you remember it as "the perfect place" .. or in my example the perfect house.
I'll explain, incase my rambling made zero sense.
I grew up in Houston, Texas in a neighborhood that was six minutes away from all of my cousins (best childhood ever). Any who, we eventually left Houston for Atlanta because of my dads new job.
I WAS DEVASTATED. I HATED my parents for ruining my life.
Throughout my teenage life I held a fond memory of that specific house. I remembered it being so perfect, so beautiful, so huggeeee.
One day we went back to Houston to visit our family... and we went back to the old house. When I arrived I remember standing there looking at it and being so disappointed ... it wasn't at all what I remembered, it wasn't the perfect home, it wasn't huge... it was just a house.
The moral of my odd story is.. the reason I held this house so dear to my heart and remembered it as being "perfect" was because of the memories I'd made growing up.
That is what Barcelona feels like to me...
It was PERFECT because of the memories I made, perfect because of the people I met, perfect because the sense of hope it gave me when I left.
So come to Barcelona with me, let's explore together.
But before I get to Barcelona, I'll have to explain a little of Amsterdam.
I spent about three days in Amsterdam ... I wasn't there alone yet I ended up leaving confused and lonely.
I thought I'd find what I was looking for while in Amsterdam but I didn't... I needed more. I wasn't ready to head back to reality..
The night before we were set to leave for the airport I woke up randomly and started looking up flights to Barcelona. I was unsure of what I'd do when I got there all I knew what that there was a beach and three flights leaving the following day and one of them had a seat with my name on it.
But I didn't book the flight I just slept on the idea.
The morning came and we overslept. I had already missed the two earlier flights ... I was no longer 100% convinced that Barcelona was where I needed to go (I was gonna get there much later than I desired)... and there was still one direct flight back to Minnesota that I could have easily taken.
Luckily, I shared these thoughts with the person I was with and he encouraged me to take on the journey... to experience the solo travel life and I'll forever thank him for that extra push.
Barcelona would be my first international solo trip and I was nervously excited (my tummy was turning and I was feeling all of that nervousness that I can't seem to put into words)!!!
I was freezing the entire plane ride (about 2 1/2hrs). The plane was NOT cold and I had on my travel jacket .. yet I was freezing my butt off.. talk about feeling like a nervous flyer (i'm really not).
Anyway I regretted my decision of the "solo travel life" almost immediately. But I knew I had picked the perfect location to make this mistake because everything was in spanish and everyone spoke spanish so luckily language was not a barrier.
However, if you know me ... you know I am AWFUL at following directions.
It took me about 6 weeks to find the location for Uber pickup (they don't have friendly airport uber signs like they do here in the US) and when I got there... my Uber still took about 9weeks to arrive !! Apparently there was airport traffic congestion going on... so I waited, patiently.
I finally made it on the uber and I took a seat in the back of the car. Looking out the window the entire ride, like a nervous puppy who'd just gotten adopted.
I checked into the hotel around 6PM and I immediately got ready to hit the Barcelona streets.
As usual I was STARVING and I didn't know what the heck I wanted to eat so I did as I normally do when I don't know what I want... I went on a walk looking for options, taking the scenic route of course.
My hotel was located across the street from the Arc of Triomf, so naturally that was the start of my walk.
I sat here for a while people watching...; the couples, the friends, the families... and somehow I didn't feel alone.
I continued on my journey.
I walked through a beautiful park and even the Barcelona Zoo (or at least it smelled like it).
Once I passed the zoo my walk started to get a bit quieter. The streets were less busy and there was zero signs of food... I kept telling myself "okay if you don't see anything within the next 5 minutes you'll have to turn around alondra" ... yet 10 minutes passed and I couldn't seem to turn around. Something was calling my name and I wasn't sure what.
Just as I was about to settle for a weird looking restaurant I saw a group of girls wearing bathing suits and a beach bag and I excitedly thought "THE BEACH MUST BE NEARBY!!!".... so I ditched the restaurant and kept on walking.
Soon enough my toes met the sand and my eyes spotted the ocean waves, I had found where I was meant to be.
Besides the fact that the sun was going down the beach was still jam-packed with people playing volleyball, laying out on their beach towels, and kids playing in the water. I walked along the water for a bit until my stomach growled and reminded me that I still had not fed it.
There was a ton of beach restaurants to pick from so I picked the first one I came across and proudly asked for a "TABLE FOR ONE".
The Croatia VS Russia game was playing on the TV in front of me (I was pretty invested in the World Cup) so I happily settled in and ordered my first beer in Barcelona
"I had never been a "beer type of girl" until I realized that the taste of a beer is always consistent and thats honestly all I ever want in a drink... consistency"
If any of you guys watched the Croatia VS Russia game you can agree with me that it was such an intense and incredibly long match... I was heavily invested. I ordered food (not the yummiest... but it stopped my stomach from growling and the beer made up for it).
The restaurant started getting busier and the tables around me quickly started filling up (someone even took one of the chairs from my table, rude). To my right there was a group of guys discussing the game, I would pick up here and there on the commentary but my main focus was on the penalty shots!
One of the guys from the group randomly started talking to me regarding the game and I quickly realized that my soccer knowledge was way better than his (and I know nothing) so I found myself *attempting* to explain the World cup to my friendly table mate.
Before I knew it I was pulling out the book I had stuffed inside my purse and sharing my favorite authors with a complete stranger. (I always carry a book with me whenever I'm solo).
Every time I go on a trip my sister gives me the talk on being safe and not talking to strangers... and every trip.. I fail at this miserably.
I'm usually not the type of person who can have full on conversations with a stranger...(and I'm not referring to small talk, I HATEEE SMALL TALK) but here I was being a chatty Kathy with someone I'd just met and I was intrigued at how effortless it was.
The game was over and I was excited because Croatia had been victorious.
I knew I'd have to part ways with the friendly stranger. But not just yet because he ended up ditching his friends and joining me on my walk down the beach (one of my all-time favorite things to do is walk on the beach at night and just focus on the sound of the waves).... the night was young and beautiful.
Here I go once again.. breaking the no getting in the car with a stranger rule. We shared a cab to "Las Ramblas" (it's a super long street filled with outside restaurants... vendors... random alleyways.. etc). The friendly stranger had been there the day before and he said it was a MUST SEE in Barcelona... I had zero plans so I went along with it.
At this point we can stop calling him the "friendly stranger" and we'll call him R.
Before you think I'm crazy for being an incredibly trusting human being ... well no, I guess you can call me a crazy human. I truly felt safe with R (judge me, I dare you).
He was unbelievably respectful.. a true gentlemen. Most importantly I did not sense in any way that he was trying to flirt or get any action (besides talking) from me.. so I was happy with the unexpected pleasant company.
Any who, lets go back to Las Ramblas.
The architecture was aesthetically pleasing to my eyes. Ahhhh, beautiful, soo beautiful.
Sadly I didn't take any pictures (I was too engrossed in the conversation my phone stayed tucked away in my purse the entire walk).
It was Saturday night and Las Ramblas was filled with party crowds. Nightclub promoters were out to get us to trying to get us into the "best clubs" ... but I had zero intentions of dancing my butt off that night. I just wanted to walk every corner in Barcelona.... and it was going great, until my feet gave up on me.
We settled into a cute bar with wooden decorations and barrels as tables. Besides me and R there was only one other group of locals enjoying a glass of wine, they were playing all of my favorite Spanish club songs and I was a human karaoke singing along to every single one ..(who needs a club).
Before I knew it it was after 1AM and my unstoppable yawning was hinting at me that it was past my bed time. Meanwhile R's friends were blowing up his phone asking him of his whereabouts (they were waiting for him so they could go out to the club, sorry friends). I called for an uber and I told him I would be fine waiting solo .. the streets were still filled with crowds and I already felt bad for making his friend wait.
Of course he declined my offer so we both sat there in the middle of Las Ramblas waiting for my uber who NEVER arrived! I messaged the driver when it informed me of his arrival and all he did was send me a thumbs up emoji and for some reason I couldn't call him.
On top of that he wasn't cancelling the trip so it wasn't allowing me to contact another uber so I was LIVID (mainly because the driver was being so rude by not answering... unfortunately my new friend R was seeing that tired/angry side of me.
He was so sweet and offered to pay for my cab to my hotel (I didn't have cash).
I normally wouldn't have allowed it but the wait for another uber would have been another extensive waiting period and I was ready to be in bed ... so I took him up on the offer and finally made it to my hotel room... in one piece.
Besides the uber experience Barcelona was off to a lovely start.
The following day I had plans to wake up bright and early to make it to La Sagrada Familia and then head to the beach for a beach bum day. But my sleep schedule had a different idea. I woke up right at 1PM, talk about sleep recovery!
I had text messages from R asking me about my morning ... LOL.
He and his friends had taken full advantage of the morning and did so much! I told him I would be headed to the Sagrada soon. It was Sunday and the tickets to go inside of the Basilica were sold out so a guided tour was the only way in.
They had already purchased tour tickets... and apparently I had been included in the group (such a sweet gesture)
The tour was set to start at 4PM so I had more than enough time to walk there and find food along the way.
I walked past the cutest little coffee shop so naturally I had to stop.
There were two guys at the counter and ohhhhhmy they were good looking I totally panicked ordering a coffee and said the dumbest thing "me puede dar un cafe dulce... " translated to "can I get a sweet coffee".
It may not sound as dumb now but it was... I'm assuming he found it adorable because we laughed it off together. He told his coworker in his sexy Spanish accent "haz el cafe mas dulce para la señorita".
Ahh and how was the coffee you're asking?.. SWEET, just as I asked (they even gave me sugar packages just in case haha .. ) and off I went continuing my walk to La Sagrada Familia.
I arrived before R and his friends and I found a front row seat to the beautiful monument. I was in awe.... I could not take my eyes off of it. There's soooo much depth to it
I was lost in my thoughts enjoying the view when I heard someone randomly say something next to me. Besides the fact that there was a million people surrounding me it was safe to say he was talking to me.
He was quite the talker, very charismatic, and sarcastic.
I quickly learned his name ... and forgot it almost immediately (I'm awful at remembering names), he was from London, and he was solo because his friends had taken earlier flights and his wasn't till later that evening.
We'll call this stranger London
( I actually saved his number on my phone with that name because I was ashamed to ask for his name again .. so if you're reading this now would be the time to ask for your name again LOL).
London mentioned that this monument was one that could easily be appreciated from the outside and going inside would be unnecessary.... which is when I mentioned that I was actually waiting for my new friends so that we could go inside.
In a very serious tone he then mentioned that we had 10 minutes to become friends and he would take all of my touristy pictures. I did not oppose to that so we walked around the Sagrada while I awkwardly *posed* for 10 minutes.
Soon enough our 10 minutes were up and R and his friends had finally arrived to the meet up location so I exchanged numbers with my new found friend London and never expected to hear from him again...
The tour was about 1 1/2 and it was incredibly informative. Our tour guide was Argentinan and he had the best accent (I love accents).
FUN FACT: most of the people that I interacted with (uber drivers, bartenders, etc) were not born in Barecelona most of them moved there after going to visit and falling in love with the city.
Apparently we chose a great day to tour the Sagrada because they had just opened up a section inside that had been closed for a long period of time.
The inside of the Sagrada was mesmerizing and every detail was just as impeccable as the outside was ... but in a way I had to agree with London and say that you can get about 76% of appreciation from the outside.
However, I would actually love to attend an actual mass inside of the Sagrada and I think I would appreciate it 1000% more. So I've added that to my bucket list for my next visit to Barcelona.
Once our guided tour was over we lingered around taking pictures and admiring the little details.
R is an actual professional photographer (HE'S SO TALENTED) so he was getting content and I was constantly bothering him to take my picture for my instagram.
I originally had planned to beach bum it out after visiting the Sagrada which is why I was wearing a swim suit and not a regular shirt but R and his friends were planners and they were headed to another tourist trap: Park Guell.
That park also sells out fairly quickly and they had purchased tickets already. They insisted I'd join them and try to get a ticket at the door, so I went along with it.
Upon arrival there was a big sign stating SOLD OUT so my chances of going in were NONE.
I didn't know much about the park so I wasn't too interested in going inside so I left on a solo walking adventure that would lead me to empty streets and beautiful views.
I came across a lovely tiny bookstore that was closing soon. Unfortunately, I didn't stay long enough to explore and find a good read.
But it was a sweet treat to have ran into it.
I thought I'd never see London again but I ended up having a beer with him right before he was set to head to the airport.
My favorite thing about him was that he spoke his mind and was incredibly sarcastic ... he was like a male version of myself but in a much much cooler way.
We had light hearted conversations about life and relationships and then he was off to the airport.
At this point I had zero idea of where I was so I gave in and called an uber to take me back to my hotel.
Later that evening I went to the Gothic Quarters which was very similar to Las Ramblas but a bit more of a dark vibe.
I walked around the area for a bit and settled in for a solo dinner and wine. R joined in shortly after. He was also in Gothic Quarters taking photographs. (I've seen his edited pictures from this trip and WOAH, it's definitely interesting to see the images through his lens and how beautifully he was able to capture everything).
I was ready to call it an early night because I was pretty darn exhausted. But not before I had the brilliant idea of walking back to my hotel without using GPS because I slightly remembered where I was and I wanted to go with the flow and follow my instinct.... (terrible idea).
R was a bit skeptical about not using a GPS but he rolled along with my silly idea... and off we went on our walk that would eventually lead us to some dangerous/ fun experiences.
A few miles into our walk I realized that I no longer knew where the heck we were .... but I could sense (I'm such a weirdo sometimes) that the beach was nearby so I suddenly wanted to go to the beach rather than my hotel so our walk continued heading onto a different direction.
During our walk we had many red flags on it being a terrible idea. But the conversation was lovely and the night was beautiful and we didn't turn back.
We found ourselves circling and with no beach in sight I was about to call it quits and just call in an uber BUT we broke the no GPS rule and that's when I realized I was only 9 minutes away from my hotel so I wasn't too off on the location.
The beach was a further walk so I opted to go on with the original plan and walk towards the hotel.
The streets were all pitch black and me and R were the only walking souls. It was as if we stumbled onto a movie scene and everyone was off on their lunch break.
The GPS said we were 3 minutes away from the hotel and I spotted a cute corner that I wanted to take a quick picture in ...
somewhere in between taking the picture and getting distracted we ended up walking in a direction further away from the hotel.
But hey, at least I got my picture for the 'gram
Somehow, someway, we ended up walking towards a street that was filled with bars.
We mutually agreed that we were in need of a drink because:
A. We'd been walking for a while
B. Why not?
C. The bars were cute! (okay this was probably only me)
The first bar we went in was pretty empty and they were closing soon.. so we left.
The bar next door seemed pretty packed so we walked in ... and the first thing I heard was latin music (salsa to be exact) I LOVE SALSA MUSIC!
We got our drink and as soon as we settled in ... the music changed.
This bar had a downstairs section to it and we decided to check it out... it was a whole new world down there. Literally.
It was like a cave, so dark and filled with fake smoke.
The music was a lot better than it was upstairs so we stayed and just followed along with the party.
I was enjoying watching the locals dance .... it was such a thrilling experience. I've been to many clubs/bars before but this one was just something else, the vibe was everything.
Also, watching R dance was seemingly entertaining. Apparently this was his FIRST club experience EVER.
We stayed there until the music stopped and the lights turned on .. dancing our toes away.
Once exiting the bar/club we were greeted by the cutest little dog who was busy skateboarding ... I can't make this stuff up and I wish I had a picture to show. It was the cutest little pug on a skateboard.
After carefully deciding our options I felt confident in continuing our walk .... even though I was slightly dreading it.
The streets after dark didn't seem too inviting but we went for it anyway.
As we turned a corner a guy in a bike rode past us and I got instant chills. I had a weird feeling about him.
There were others groups of people walking around us at this time which helped calmed my nerves.
But as we turned another corner a random man told us to be careful that the streets weren't safe. We picked up our pace and once again found ourselves in the location where we took THE picture.
This is when everythinggggg took a turn for the worse in a matter of 20 seconds.
I spotted the guy with the bike and as soon as I turned around there was another guy that was lunging towards R with the ill intention of stealing his camera (he had it strapped around his body and was carrying it because of the photography he had done at the gothic quarters earlier that night).
R was on the floor holding onto his camera and my phone (he had taken it just moments before to check how close we were).
I was freaking the fuck out. I was just about to try to push this man off of R but that's when a random man told me to run to his taxi as he pushed the bad guy away.
As soon as the taxi man pushed off the bad guy he took off.
Luckily, he was unable to steal R's camera and we both ran towards the taxi. Turns out the man who helped us was a taxi driver and he was out looking for a group of passengers that had called for a taxi which is when he saw everything go down.
Once inside the taxi I had some sort of panic attack first it was internal ..and then I just started sobbing like a baby.
I was so grateful nothing awful had happened. The taxi man was literally our guardian angel that night.
Meanwhile all of this was happening my phone was casually blowing up. Turns out I was getting awful text messages sent to me right at the exact same time R was on the floor with my phone in hand. I read all of these messages while in the taxi and it only added on to my anxiety... the night could seriously not get any worse.
Except it kinda did.
The taxi man couldn't take us to my hotel just yet because he had to wait for his actual passengers so he called on his taxi friend to take us. This man was a total jerk.
I explained to him what had just happened to us and he didn't even move a face muscle.
On top of that he insisted on dropping us off at the SAME LOCATION where everything occurred. He was not understanding our frustration and I was NOT getting out of the taxi until I knew where the heck I was.
He was not being helpful and finally I told him to drop us off in front of the Arc Of Triomf which was located right infront of my hotel. When I finally knew where I was we got out of the taxi and legit RAN to the hotel entrance.
I can't explain the feeling... but that run helped ease my anxiety.
Once inside my hotel room .. I broke down.
R had a front row seat to my dramatic show.
Besides almost being mugged all of the things that I had been feeling when leaving Amsterdam had been proven to be right by those messages. That was incredibly hard to process (female intuition is always right).
I instantly felt extra grateful for R's presence. I don't think I could have dealt with that alone, in a foreign country, away from all of my family and friends.
Also, I love getting the male perspective when it comes to relationships problems.
This is when I learned that R was madly in love with his girlfriend of many many years... and I was given hope once again.
That all good guys aren't extinct.
After calming down a bit and having a heart to heart with R he called a cab and left.
I'll forever remember this night as being the most bizarre night of my life.
I feel as if everything that happened that night held a deeper meaning/purpose. Something I can't fully explain but it was meant to happen.
That night I was up tossing and turning like a dead fish, I could not sleep.
The following morning I was checking out of my hotel room and going to an Air Bnb that was closer to the beach.
I was in dier need of a beach bum day. As soon as I settled into my new place I walked over to the beach.... holding onto my purse like it was my job.
I didn't have a beach towel.. but luckily the beach vendors were out and selling beer, water, and beach towels .. the sweetest combos.
I purchased the most adorable handmade beach towel with a tree engraved to it and I got cozy for my long beach day ahead.
My day consisted of tanning, reading, swimming, people watching, sleeping, drinking beer, and self reflecting.
Besides the negative things surrounding my personal life I was feeling blessed beyond measures. I was heartbroken but at least I was heartbroken in a beach in Barcelona.
t's important to add that this beach was not a complete nude beach but most girls were walking around topless. I felt so silly for wearing a one piece.
I wanted to run back home and change to my two piece just so I could walk around topless and get a proper beach tan, but I know for next time.
My solo beach bum day was just what I needed to get my heart and mind in the right place.
Around 8pm I made plans with R to have dinner since we'd be parting ways the next day.
Me back to reality and he and his friends would continue on their European journey. They were headed to Malaga, Spain.
We picked a spot on the beach for dinner and I finally got to try the famous Paella everyone had been telling me to try.
It was delicious! It reminded me of Jambalaya.
After dinner we layed out on the sand hearing the waves crash and star gazing.
Nonetheless, it was the perfect night with the very best company.
He was willing to listen to me and my constant rambling, question my actions, ask me about my dreams, aspirations, and my hopes for the future.
It's truly hard to find a kind soul these days and I'm eternally happy I was able to connect with him on a level that made my heart feel full and free.
R was the friend I never knew I needed.
I'll eternally be grateful for Barcelona for being the place for me to have felt my lowest all while showing me the brighter side to life.
I left the next day with a happy heart and a new found love for traveling alone... because traveling alone doesn't necessarily mean you'll be lonely.
If you're like me .. and scared to travel solo.
Just DO IT! You'll be surprised how fulfilling of a trip it'll turn out to be.
"The most beautiful thing about traveling ... is the people you meet along the way and the memories created.
Meet my wonderful friend R"
If you've made it to this part of the blog... you've officially traveled with me to Barcelona.
I hope I was able to make you feel like you were part of my journey.
I know it was incredibly long.. but it didn't feel right to shorten up a trip that meant so much to me.
Thank you for your constant support... I cannot stress enough just how much it means to have you reach out and tell me that you've read my post.
I hope this one didn't bore you to tears.
I love y'all.
I wanna travel
but... I only have 5$
First and foremost, I'd like to say THANK YOU... to all of you guys that have joined my journey of sometimes writing and sometimes not.. Facebook recently reminded me that it's been TWO YEARS ..twoooo years.. since I started this. Wow, time sure does "fly" by.
As I mentioned on my social media... I've been feeling a little disconnected to the writing world and only because I've been going through amazing changes in my life and I have just been incredibly busy... (and if i'm being completely honest I can also blame netflix) . I don't know about y'all but if I'm not in a cute coffee shop I simply cannot concentrate **note: this blog might suck because I'm writing straight from my living room while listening to some old school banda with a 5$ face mask on
ANYWHO, let me get back on track ...
The travel world has always been a fascinating world and it feels like ever since "instafamous" became a thing .. the traveling has became even more desirable. Everyone wants to have those too good to be true shots ... it's the world we are living in ... and i'm a part of it, you're a part of it, ...."we're all in this together"
But "HOW IN THE HECK DO THESE PEOPLE DO IT?!" ... what is their job title?!
I am not a travel pro… and this year I have actually traveled less (I'm not including work) But i'm here to give you tips on easier ways to go about it.
Traveling has given my life a whole new meaning and I believe it's something everyone should experience.
Growing up I never knew what I wanted to do with my life.. and that was very tough on me because although I hate planning … I hate the unknown. One thing I always knew for sure was that I wanted to travel. I wanted to go everywhere and experience new things. After all my parents did name me “Alondra” which is an actual bird.. I consider myself a bird, a free spirt.
Twins, am I right?
However, traveling requires money (it’s honestly not always that expensive) but we somehow always associate traveling with high fees and automatically cross it out and head over to the same old destinations each and every year for fear of venturing out to the unknown.
I was in college a few years ago and I would always look at one of my friends social media account and see that he was constantly off traveling having a good time and he was also in college. I’d ask myself “how the heckkkk is he doing that?!” little did I know all I had to do was ask..
he was working in the airline industry. Working in the airline industry automatically signs you up for travel benefits … (please check and confirm on the airline prior to applying but to my knowledge *i did not google this* almost every airline has travel benefits for its employees no matter the position).
Travel benefits do come with ups and downs.. but when you get to get to fly around the world for little to no money .. it’s a blessing!
I started working for an airline as a customer service specialist who handled phone calls for booking/ complaints/ making flight changes etc… I was still in college during this job and for the most part I was making it work. Until my schedules started getting crazier and it was either miss work or miss class….. and at that point being unemployed was not an option.
So I decided to sit out a semester.. and till this day as I’ve mentioned previously .. I have yet to go back.
I wasted no time to start using my benefits. During training I went on a weekend streak where every weekend for almost two months I went to a different destination. You could say I was “living”. At the end of training I discovered the beauty of international travel and automatically became hooked!
It was more expensive to go eat at “Fogo de Chao” than to go to Brazil (so I did that)
It was cheaper to go to mexico/get drunk/ eat tacos/ stay at an all inclusive.. than to pay for a hotel in Miami (so i did that A LOT)
Theirs sooo much to do and see and the world literally becomes your playground. One of the hardest question for someone who has travel benefits becomes “where should I go?”
you base your travels on the weather… or … on how empty the flights look that day
AND you always have plans A.B.C.D.>Z
It’s a game of luck to which I refer to as “the non-rev games”.
I’m sure theirs a million other ways people travel for little to nothing .. this just happens to be my little trick.
I’ve recently started following a lot of travel blogger pages.. and that is more or so the direction I want to head towards someday .. but without becoming too mainstream and unrelatable. But until I figure out how to get there .. this is where I am meant to be.
Also, If you're already settled in your job field and can't relate to this …. I go back to my point of traveling not being as expensive as you may think. Theirs a million travel companies now that offer miles for just about anything.
Miles = travel money!
Credit cards like American Express can get you miles just for swiping the card and lets face it.. spending money is incredibly easy. If you don't know what to spend on.. just ask me, or give it to me .. I'll help you out.
Also, because traveling has become the new “it” thing theirs a ton of websites that seem to be making it easier to find better travel deals… just do your research.
Theirs SO much out in the world for us to see.. if we don't go out there to see it we will spend out entire lives clicking and liking other peoples adventures. Don’t be that person… if theirs a will.. theirs a way.
I hope you found this “somewhat” helpful and if you find yourself having a load of questions.. don't hesitate to contact me for advise, I’m not the best at giving advice but I sure do love to give it.
Dear Stupid boy,
"I hate your stinking guts
you're like the scum between my toes
you make me vomit..."
I have a strong urge to write this.
For all the stupid boys out there who have no boundaries, the heartless.
and if the shoe fits, well?....DO BETTER
My first and major point to this is .... why lie? most importantly why lie to a FEMALE.
Did you know that the female intuition is 99.7% always right.
I'm sure you didn't ... but now you do. So DON'T DO IT.
I cannot stress enough that 9/10 times if a female is asking you a question it's because she already has the answers and screenshots to back out all of the lies... DON'T DO IT.
Why is it so difficult to be honest?
If you're going to hurt someone you might as well hurt them once and say the damn truth.
The truth hurts... but at least it's the truth.
One bad lie turns into a million bad lies and suddenly you're drowning in a big pool of lies and it's impossible to breathe because prior to starting your lying spree you never learned how to swim
(hence: NEVER BEING HONEST) so you find yourself forever drowning. DON'T BE THAT PERSON.
One of the worst feelings ... is believing in someone only to find out it was all a lie.
Why ruin something that was going so perfect.
And to do it to not one but two women, makes it a million times worse.
Couldn't you just have picked one? Like they do in the Bachelor.
(The Bachelor is a reality show that i'm obsessed with. Where 20+ girls compete for the love of ONE guy and in the end he picks one girl and they get engaged, perfect fairytale ending, right?)
EXCEPT in this scenario no one signed up to be a part of the show.
When exactly were you planning to "choose"?
How long can someone keep lies like this going?
It's terrifying to realize just how good people can become at lying.
It also serves as a lesson.
A painful one.
Nonetheless, a lesson that no one deserved.
Not when the love was genuine.
It's easier to say "I hate you" but that's just the immaturity and pain talking.
Even a stupid boy like you deserves love...
One day you'll look back and realize that the "stupid boy" could have been "the lucky man" had he just made up his mind.
Had he not played himself.
Had he been honest.
You see ... it may be easier, it may be more thrilling to be the stupid boy when you're in high school and when you're weighing in your options (do I want the hot blonde or the weird brunette .. hmm?)
But NOT when you're old enough to know better.
NOT when the two individuals involved are exceptional women.
NOT when you're aware that you are breaking two hearts.
If you are one of the stupid boys ... I hope you find peace with yourself.
I hope YOU learn.
I hope YOU grow up.
I hope YOU learn to value the meaning of love.
of transparency .. of honesty.. of trust.
of what being an equal partner means.
"Life is already difficult.
Relationships should make it easier.
Yet too often we choose relationships that complicate it" ....
If you have been a victim of a stupid boy. LET THEM GO.
Lies are not a sign of love.
Betrayal is not a sign of love.
Pain is not a sign of love.
Don't be that girl that lets a stupid boy take their shine. You deserve the world and a diamond ring.
Not a bag filled with empty promises.
If you keep hearing about this "crazy ex" chances are ... he's giving her reasons to act crazy. Females don't go crazy for no reason. 9/10 HE'S the problem not her!
If you're the "crazy ex" and you keep hearing about the "girl who is always there" she's there because she is constantly given reasons to stay (and more than likely she's already in love).
My advice: TALK TO THE "CRAZY EX". TALK TO "THE GIRL WHO'S ALWAYS THERE". (if you care enough to know the whole story) ... and without drama of course.
We females need to stop blaming each other... and stand together. It's not our fault that the stupid boy acted like a stupid boy.
Lastly and most importantly stupid boy,
I want you to know that I do not hold any hate in my heart for you because you lied..
However, I have lost the respect and admiration I had for you because you made me believe.
I don't understand why someone would make you fly so high only to drop you without a parachute nor a fair warning.
You may have been telling the truth, you may actually love me (or not) in your own sick way.. you may actually love her (or both).
Who knows? Who cares.
All I know is I will never trust you again.
This is my goodbye to you stupid boy
I left your shirt in the trashcan in an empty hotel room and I took my heart with me.
Despite everything I will NOT allow you to change my heart nor take my spark.
I wish you the best in this cold happy strange world.
I love you,
your pretty lady