SWIPE RIGHT: the millennial way of dating
Yep, I did it. I downloaded a Dating App and I have no shame.
Why? you may ask.... I'll answer: THE DATING WORLD IS TOUGH... it's rough out here. It's like a case of the walking dead where the instinct species are decent men and the zombies are the women trying to attack anything thats moves. OK, maybe thats a little over the top but ya get me. (i don't even watch the walking dead so that may have been a terrible reference.
Believe it or not the reason for me downloading this app wasn't necessarily because i was looking to romantically date anyone. I was rather scouting friendships and cool hangout spots in my new city (Minnesota). After all it is practically 2018 and everyone knows that the easiest way of meeting someone nowadays is online. So that's what I did.
The app I use has a silly method of getting information from you, it asks random questions like
"would you rather...... (and you have to fill in the blanks)" or "A fact about me that surprises people _______" etc. So it's a funny way of catching someones attention and a great conversation starter. I was hooked and mad I hadn't tried this earlier.
The way it works is you can be the one "liking" someones picture or commenting on their profiles. Or you can simply wait for people to like your picture or comment on your answers...and well that's the method I go for. I don't necessarily like being the one to initiate conversation, it's already weird enough that I have one of these profiles LOL.
Once someone says something to you, you can choose to ignore them or reply and start a conversation. Pretty damn basic.
Now I'm sure you all are wondering if this has worked out for me.... so i''ll give y'all the details and let you all be the judge.
Altogether i went on dates with 5 different guys.
Guy number one, I was super nervous. What if I got cat-fished or kidnapped (i told a friend of my whereabouts on all of these dates so i was kinda in the clear .. kids don't try this at home) but most importantly what if it was awkward?! Luckily, none of that happened. He was a super cool guy and I instantly knew I wanted to be his friend and nothing else so I gave him the we are going to be friends and friends only vibe and i thought we were on the same page. Turns out he was on chapter two and i still hadn't even got to the second page so I had to let that go.
Guy number two, I wasn't as nervous for this one. I felt like a dating app pro (if that's even a thing)?
We decided to meet up on a specific day but on the day of he didn't necessarily confirm a time just a location (WHO DOES THAT?). So I obviously wasn't going to wait around. My friend invited me to the Minnesota State Fair and of course I didn't decline (fried food?! I'm there!). I was at the fair for a while and didn't realize I didn't have cell service ... when I finally had service I checked the app and I had about 7 messages from him the first said that he'd be there at 6/ then at 530 he sent another saying he was on his way/ at 610 he said he was going to order an appetizer/ and at 615pm i was barely getting all of the messages... LOL. I hate cancelling so i told him i was nearby (i really wasn't) so i left the fair and eventually made it to the restaurant. The waitress had given him a courtesy beer because she was beginning to think he got stood up haha.
I liked the fact that he was patient enough to wait over an hour for me so he didn't automatically get the "friend zone" vibe.. he was also very easy to talk to and we ended the night with a walk around the lake which was a nice touch to a hectic start.
I'm pretty terrible at keeping up with people so after the date I didn't reply to a text message and we lost touch after that... so i figured it wasn't meant to be and I left it at that.
Guy number three .. (five is starting to sound like a lot).
He was also new in town so i thought it was nice that we had that in common. This time i made sure to get the location AND time so I knew not to go off and do something else. We didn't do the usual "dinner and drinks" which made me very excited. Instead he suggested we meet up at a cool bar that had a variety of arcade games, including my two favorites: skeeball and pacman!
It was kinda cool to see the competitive side of a complete stranger and interact in that way instead of the usual questionnaire, so i definitely enjoyed this particular date.
I didn't necessarily friend zone this one and I actually texted back... but i think in this case he friend zoned me (KARMA). He did mention having a busy life schedule ... but that of course is always code for "HE'S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU" so i moved right along.
Guy number four.. (almost done guys, promise).
This guy was a super sweet guy who I had been messaging with for a while. Our schedules never coincided and I wasn't really spending much time in Minnesota. We were finally able to meet up and he picked this super cool brewery near the city. It was such a chill spot and the beer was bomb. Conversation was also very great, it helped that we had been talking for several weeks so it wasn't awkward at all, however, i did feel like we connected on a friend level more than we did romantically. Another cool thing about this was that he invited me to watch him play softball at a nearby park so i thought that was really sweet. It was pretty cold but I was glad i made it out. After the date he probably realized that i'm not as cool in real life as i am over snap/messages so we just lost contact.
Last but not least (as promised) guy number five!
He was interesting from the start ... i couldn't necessarily figure him out through messages so I was excited to meet him in person. He gave me the name of the restaurant and we agreed to meet at a certain time. I ended up working on this particular day but I had just enough time to make it to dinner.
That day I changed at the airport and looked a hot mess so it was already off to a chaotic start.
I put the name of the restaurant in my GPS and it said i was 25 minutes away so I let him know i'd be there soon. He mentioned that the restaurant was located in the Uptown area so I immediately started to get a red flag when I was 5 minutes away and the only surrounding thing was a large lake. He said he was inside so I parked and headed in. To my surprise the restaurant was empty, only one table had guests and he was NOT one of them lol. It was then that we realized we were in different locations.
While the best solution would have been to sit down and just have normal millennial FaceTime dinner date (KIDDING, didn't consider doing this) he offered to meet me somewhere in between, which was very thoughtful. I thought he would have cancelled at that point haha i almost did but as i mentioned i HATE cancelling, plus i was starving.
He made it a point to send me the address rather than the name which i thought was hilarious.
An hour later we were finally having dinner ... as usual the conversation was great he understood and matched my sarcastic personality which was refreshing. But just like with text messages i couldn't read him ... so i didn't expect to ever see him again.
However, he surprisingly turned out to be the guy i went out with more than three times. We ended up going to the correct restaurant the second time around and the host also recognized him which was pretty funny..
I was pretty skeptical about writing about this experience because i know how judgmental people can be. But if i'm being completely honest one of the reasons why i downloaded the app and went out on these dates was because i wanted to write about it.
Ironically i got the urge to try this out after i wrote my post "PARTY OF ONE".
Based on my experience i'd say that I did meet great individuals who weren't necessarily meant for me ... but it was nice to go out and figure that out for myself.
I have met people who have met their significant others on these types of things so even though i wasn't expecting anything i was secretly hopeful it would work out for me too.
One of the things i did not enjoy was how repetitive talking to someone new can be. I got tired of answering the same questions, of small talk, of explaining my weird lifestyle and at one point i would confuse one thing one guy would tell me with someone else... it was just weird.
I felt like the Bachelorette going on all these one on one dates.
Do i recommend single people out there to try it.. YES. Well if you have the time (it can be time consuming). Who knows maybe it can work for you ;)
As for me, i think i will be retiring my profile for a bit.
Thanks for reading my blogs, i truly appreciate it!
It makes me incredibly happy to get random messages of people letting me know they enjoy reading them (keep them coming).